walking by faith, even when I can't see

Following God can be a tricky business. There are so many things that can interfere like my own desires, fears, doubts, bad advice, misinterpretation of truth, and many more I'm sure. Some people have to follow God through tragedy before they reach the fulfillment of promise. I just was to look at a few examples.

• Abraham and Sarai promised a son- they were elderly when fulfilled
• Joseph called by God to be a great leader, even over his older brothers- fulfilled after 7 years of slavery and 7 more in prison
• David anointed to be King- pursued by Saul who wanted to kill him
• Jonah called to preach to a group of people he hated intensely
• Saul (Paul) convinced he was called by God to persecute Christians- became the greatest Christian evangelist and theologian of his time.
• Jesus promised to reign on David's throne in complete peace and prosperity- gave up his life for sinners and still waiting.

There are so many more examples in the Bible of people who knew what God's will was and it was really tough. There were people who thought they knew His will but tried to make it happen their way or were just way off. That is me right now. Everything that was going on in my life made it seem to me and others that God was orchestrating events for me to be a chaplain at York County Prison. Then, unexpected by all it fell apart. GNJP ministry is going to talk to me about placement opportunities elsewhere. This is a small thing compared to the examples I gave, but my journey is not complete. God knows where I can have the greatest impact and that I am willing to do whatever He wants me to do. The time that I have to serve Him on earth is limited and I see my life as worthless if I do anything else.

Of course I am disappointed and frustrated. I was planning on moving in three weeks and have been trying to sell my house since June. I put my notice in at work a few weeks ago. I was excited to start working in the prison. Jess and I were really looking forward to being with family.

But, I cannot see how it all will end. I cannot even see what is next, it may be so much better and we could be so much more excited. But, what if it wasn't? Who says it will be? I'm sure we can all list examples of Christians throughout the ages who didn't have it so good because of following God. Am I still willing to follow? As Christians, our hope is not in this life but in eternity. That is why Paul said that if what we believe is false, then Christians should be pitied more than all others. I don't know what's next. But, I will serve the Lord. Right now I feel like my life is up in air.

Now all I can do it wait...